By Leroy Adams

In the Western world, masculinity, especially among Black men, has often been associated with toughness, assertiveness, and communal expressions of “toughen up” because “men don’t cry.” This brand of masculinity has created a culture of brotherhood where Black men and boys struggle to express their feelings, show vulnerability, and view each other as threats.

I have traveled to over 20 countries and lived abroad for six years. Each country – from Finland to India to Ethiopia to Colombia – has exposed me to a different type of masculinity and expression of brotherhood. And because of this, I find myself open to healthier and less aggressive expressions of love and connection with my brothers. I don’t want to be “hard” but simply at peace around them. 

Lessons from Ethiopian and Chinese Cultures

In Ethiopia, there’s a genuine warmth and intimacy shared among men that, at first glance, might seem unfamiliar to our American eyes. I recall my first introduction to the practice during a Peace Corps cultural training session. Ethiopian men, in their expression of camaraderie and brotherly love, would hold hands or even sit on each other’s laps. 

Say what now? That’s what I said! I would never. What if my…got too close to his…and then what if we…

My mind just went racing with all kinds of wild homophobic ideas. My boy Sam, another Black American volunteer, and I made eye contact when the instructor mentioned hand-holding and lap-sitting. Without saying a word to each other, we understood what the other was thinking, “My boys and I would never do some sh*t like that.”

It would take months and many sessions of cultural training to learn the depth of this connection is rooted in the broader Arabic and African tradition, where men holding hands is a sign of mutual respect and friendship. Sam and I were not the only Americans confused and judgmental about such a practice. 

About six months into my service in Ethiopia, when cultural norms became the norm, I could see the expression of genuine friendship through hand-holding and, yes, lap-sitting. However, it took me months and continuous effort to remove the American lens from which I viewed the world. And even though I personally never felt comfortable enough to embrace all aspects of this tradition, the underlying message was clear: Here, brotherhood is gentle, intimate, and unconditional.

Now, shifting our gaze to the East, Chinese culture unveils a different facet of this same brand of brotherhood. I spent two years living in Beijing and would see the various expressions of masculinity among young adult Chinese men (I never really saw it with older Chinese men). Their interactions were marked by hugs, arms around the shoulders, laughter, and playfulness. 

In an article by Duncan Muir, “Chinese Male Intimacy: On Men Holding Hands,” the author states: “Anyone will tell you that homosexuality is much less accepted in China than in the West, so why is male intimacy much more commonplace? The truth is that though many older, traditional Chinese people view homosexuality as a Western import, it’s homophobia that was imported thanks to British influence following the opium wars. Unlike Judaeo-Christian or Islamic societies, China’s traditional culture had no clear definition between heterosexuality and homosexuality.”

What’s the take-home message for us, fellas? It’s this: Around the world, some cultures have carved their own definitions of masculinity and brotherhood, which don’t necessitate dominance or bravado. 

Can we, as Black men, now equipped with an understanding of how Western social practices have defined masculinity for us, begin to redefine and practice our own brand of masculinity?

A CALL TO MY BROTHERS

Travel, my brothers, is more than just seeing new places or tasting different cuisines. It’s a transformative journey that has the power to reshape our most deep-seated beliefs and open our eyes to the boundless expressions of the human experience. By stepping outside our comfort zones, we discover different cultures and unveil previously hidden layers of ourselves. 

For Black men, especially, this exploration is a chance for us to redefine and rediscover masculinity in its most diverse and profound forms. By witnessing the gentle bonds of Ethiopian men or the playful camaraderie among young Chinese peers, we’re reminded that our manhood isn’t just confined to the societal boxes we grew up in.

To my Black brothers reading this: I challenge you to find strength in vulnerability, to embrace the myriad expressions of brotherhood, and to journey outside the familiar. Remember, true growth comes from exploring both the world and the self. So, let’s step out, explore, and challenge our definitions because culture travels for growth.

Visit CultureTravels.Co to read the full article. Leroy Adams is a world traveler and publisher of San Antonio-based Culture Travels magazine.

As the Spurs secure their #1 pick and the IPW Travel Conference puts a spotlight on our city, District 2 stands at the precipice of a booming billion-dollar tourism industry. This convergence of sports and tourism forms the backdrop of our exclusive live podcast event brought to you by East-Side-based Culture Travels magazine.

Join us as we delve into the intertwined worlds of travel and sports tourism with our distinguished guests: Jalen Mckee Rodriguez, Council Person of District 2, Deborah Omowale Jarmon, CEO/Director of the San Antonio African American Community Archive and Museum, Dr. Kara Allen, Chief Impact Officer for the San Antonio Spurs, and Jenny Carnes, CEO of San Antonio Sports.

This event will take place on August 18 at 6 P.M. at District 2 favorite – Tank’s Pizza.

Jalen, known for his engaging persona and passion for community growth, will take us on a journey through his personal travels, providing insight on how exploring new places, cultures, and experiences has fueled their tireless advocacy for the development of District 2.

Additionally, In the wake of the Spurs’ key draft pick and the potential surge of tourism following the IPW conference, Jalen offers his perspective on how these two factors intertwine with the economic prosperity of District 2. In an era where sports, culture, and economics are more interlinked than ever, understanding the potential impact on District 2’s economy becomes both enlightening and imperative.

We also welcome three extraordinary special guests: Deborah Omowale Jarmon, CEO/Director of the San Antonio African American Community Archive and Museum, Jenny Carnes, CEO of San Antonio Sports, and Dr. Kara Allen, Chief Impact Officer for the San Antonio Spurs. Their expertise and insights will further illuminate the intersection of sports, tourism, and economic growth in our city.

This live podcast event is perfect for those passionate about travel and tourism, who want to understand the economic relationship between the San Antonio Spurs and District 2’s economy or are eager to gain insights into the potential of district-focused development. Join us for a thought-provoking discussion, diverse perspectives, and a deeper understanding of the dynamics of travel and sports tourism.

Limited seats! Register today! We look forward to seeing you there!

Buddy Pass Travel Magazine, a leading voice for African American travelers, has received an exclusive invitation from the Tourism Authority of Thailand (TAT) to participate in their Amazing Thailand Health and Wellness New Chapter New Experience Bloggers Review FAM Trip 2023.

This invitation underscores the recognition of the Buddy Pass’s role as a leading voice and influencer in a market where African American travelers spend over $50 billion annually. Buddy Pass is a travel magazine based in San Antonio dedicated to inspiring and empowering African American travelers. Through feature articles on global destinations, practical travel tips, and profiles of inspiring Black travelers, Buddy Pass aims to be a resource that not only helps plan travels but also celebrates the diverse and vibrant African American culture within the travel industry.

The FAM Trip, scheduled from July 22-28, 2023, is an exclusive opportunity to experience firsthand the latest offerings in health and wellness tourism in Thailand. This year, TAT aims to unveil a new chapter of ‘Meaningful Health and Wellness’ to the international press and influencers.

The Buddy Pass is honored to be part of this unique experience and looks forward to sharing insights, discoveries, and practical advice about Thailand’s emerging wellness tourism trends with its readers.

“We’re excited about this exclusive opportunity to explore and report on Thailand’s latest health and wellness offerings,” says Leroy Adams, Editor-in-Chief of The Buddy Pass. “We believe that wellness and travel go hand-in-hand, and we’re thrilled to be able to bring this unique aspect of Thai culture to our readers.“

Readers of Buddy Pass can look forward to exclusive content from the event, including in-depth features on the new wellness products and experiences Thailand has to offer.